My Immortal
by Not Here Dont Talk to Me
Summary: Basically it's how Max feels after Fang leaves in FANG . I know that it's become a cliche plotline already, but I couldn't help it. It's a oneshot songfic. Kinda... depressing. Well, for me anyway. Enjoy :


**In case you're wondering guys, the song's My Immortal by Evanescence. Beautiful song if you ask me... but anyway.**

**Max POV**

I stared out the window as the rain poured down outside, watching the drops of water race across the glass, fogging it up, making it impossible to see the outside world. In the background, a radio blared, but I paid no attention to the song playing, preferring to be caught up in my own thoughts. One thought to be precise. _Fang._ Why had he left? Why did he think that I would be better on my own, that I would be a better leader without my right-hand man at my side? It was the stupidest thing I'd ever heard! Sure, I was distracted when he was around, but I was even less able to focus when he was gone. And this time he wasn't coming back. He was gone. _Gone. _He'd left me with just a stupid note to explain his actions! How could he _do _that to me? A single tear crept down my face leaving a trail of coolness in its place and I reached up a hand to brush it away before letting it drop again with a tiny sigh.

It was a month after he left and I'd barely left my room the entire time. If I did then I would see traces of _him _everywhere and I would break down. I know I would. I just wouldn't be able to help it. I'm pretty sure that if I even sighted _black _then I would burst into tears. Pathetic, I know. But true.

On the radio, the upbeat song that had been drumming into my consciousness ended and a new one began. This one was softer, more flowing, and the piano introduction had an unmistakably sad and yet hauntingly beautiful melody. It suited my mood perfectly. The singer began and I began to listen without turning from the window.

_I'm so tired of being here_

_Suppressed by all my childish fears_

_And if you have to leave_

_I wish that you would just leave_

'_Cause your presence still lingers here_

_And it won't leave me alone_

You're gone, Fang. I know that now, as much as I hate it. But it feels like you're still here. I keep listening for your voice, looking for your black. I can't help it.

_These wound won't seem to heal_

_This pain is just too real_

_There's just too much that time cannot erase_

You want me to move on with my life and be a leader. But you hurt me so, so badly, Fang. That hurt hasn't diminished yet, and I doubt it ever will. I feel as if you just took a knife and stabbed me in the heart. In some ways, that would have been easier.

_When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you'd scream I'd fight away all of you fears_

_And I held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have all of me_

You never cry and you never scream. But I know what I would have done if you had. You still have a hold over me Fang. If you came back then I'd probably jump into your arms and never let go, regardless of the good arse kicking that you truly deserve.

_You used to captivate me_

_By your resonating light_

_Now I'm bound by the life you left behind_

I've always been fascinated by you. You would seem so dark and distant all the time and then you would hold Angel, or muck around with Iggy, or sometimes just _look_ at me and I'd see that you weren't some emotionless freak after all. You were beautiful.

You left me, and I don't know what to do without you. How the hell do I go on without my second in command? Iggy's been trying to fill your place, but he's nowhere near as good as you were, and he knows it. He doesn't deny it.

_Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams_

_Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me_

_These wounds won't seem to heal_

_This pain is just too real_

_There's just too much that time cannot erase_

Will I heal? I don't know. It'll be a long time before I do. _If _I do. I'm a complete wreck and it's your fault. If we ever see you again, then the flock will murder you for what you did to me. They're hurt too, you know, Fang. They don't understand why you just up and left, with only a note to explain why. They're confused.

_When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fear_

_And I held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have all of me_

I won't deny it, Fang. I still love you. I doubt I'll ever get over you. You really were perfect for me, Fang. Everyone knows that to have a good relationship with someone, then he has to be your best friend before your boyfriend. Dylan doesn't come _close_ to what you were to me. Sorry, Dylan.

_I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone_

_But though you still with me,_

_I've been alone all along_

I really have tried to let you go Fang. Really. But it's just so _hard _to know that every time I go to sleep, I will wish that the next morning you'll come and wake me up, apologise for leaving, promise never to go again. And I'll be happy once more, because you're with me again. But I know that'll never happen.

_When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears_

_And I held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have all of me_

_All of me_

_Me_

I turned away from the window as the song ended and sighed. I miss him so much. I can't _believe _that he would just _ditch _me like that. It was kinda heartbreaking.

And I know that although on top I couldn't have been more pissed at Fang for leaving, my feeling for him deep down haven't changed a single bit.

I don't think I'll ever get over you, Fang.

**Well that was... depressing. Oh well. Review please, peoples :)**


End file.
